Reasons I love the Olympics:

#123010398834: Great cover music.



#2039238480209393: Team Norway's curling pants. Update! Now available for purchase!

#32311232109292: Graham Watanabe:

When asked in a press conference (for probably the five-hundredth time this week) what it feels like to participate in the Olympic games, Watanabe, an American Snowboarder, said, “Try to imagine Pegasus mating with a unicorn and the creature that they birth. I somehow tame it and ride it into the sky in the clouds and sunshine and rainbows. That’s what it feels like.”

 

Graham Watanabe

An approximation of the beast he tamed and rode into the sky

Costumes: Usually not heinous

When last we spoke, I promised to return with some incredibly ridiculous figure skating costumes. I did some research, and it turns out that each ridiculous costume has redeeming value. For instance, Johnny Weir is lauded in some cases for his "ornate, unapologetic style." And no matter what you think of his sometimes questionable choices, you can't help but admit that he wears them like a star.

In another article, Vera Wang (who is apparently in the Skating Hall of Fame for costume design) reviewed some of the costumes of years past. And apparently even neon has its place.

 

Questionable, but still.

But thank you, Emily, for sending me the article that opened my eyes to the sordid nature of ice dancing costumes. Because really? There is absolutely no excuse for this:

 

 

 

I mean... no.

Figure Skating: A History

This book: it exists.

I tried to check this book out from the library, but it turns out the library does not have a copy of it. "All right," I thought, "screw research." As such, this post will be light on the history, heavy on the Wikipedia, and exhaustive on the skaters in silly costumes.

This is as it should be.

We begin our journey in 1772 when an Englishman named Robert Jones published A Treatise on Skating. He described ice skating as a formal and stiff affair-- that is to say totally and completely English in every way. (To review, the Irish dancers keep their arms rigid because the English tried to root out free-wheeling Irish culture and make everything as staid and inelastic as possible.) This "English Style" of ice skating would not last long, though.

In the mid-1860s, instead of, you know, defending freedom and justice in the American Civil War, Jackson Haines was developing the figure skating style we now know and love. He was a ballet dancer, and he worked to incorporate the same grace and performance into his figure skating performances. He was the first to incorporate much of what we now understand figure skating to be-- the first to incorporate music, the first to actually attach the blades to his boots (instead of, you know, strapping them on), and the first to really do athletic moves in skating. As it turns out, it was hard to stick your landing when your skates were attached with what was basically twine.

Also please note the early introduction of ridiculous costumes.

Then some history happened. It mostly did not involve ridiculous costumes. Pity.

Meet Madge and Edgar Syers. Madge is, to date, the oldest Ladies' gold medalist at age 27.

Also, what is going on with her hat (head cake)?

Join us next time as we bring skating into the modern era with all kinds of technological advancements. Mostly? Sequins.

Winter Olympics

Snow! Chill in the air! People sledding down incredibly slick tracks face first! It can only mean one thing: the Winter Games are almost upon us!

The first Winter Games were held in Chamonix in 1924, but nobody knew it at the time. What?

It appears we are at the Winter Olympics, my dear.

Basically, the IOC held a "Nordic week" at the 1924 Olympic Games. Previously, figure skating and hockey had both appeared at the Olympics, but it had become clear that a new approach was needed. Perhaps a week all to themselves? How about eleven days that we'll call a week? Perfect.

Bobsledding was a lot more dangerous back in those days. For one thing, there were GIANT EAGLES clearly bent on killing. Also, no helmets.

From there, it was only a matter of time before the Winter Games became their own event. And once that had happened, why not retroactively declare that "Nordic Week" had actually been the first Winter Games? In fact, why not retroactively declare Pierre de Coubertin King of Everything Forever?

YEAAAAAH!

However they began, we here at Mount Olymics are glad the Winter Games persevered. (And not just because I gets a huge crush on the speed skaters every single time.) Winter sports showcase a rare instance of athleticism in sync with the natural (or semi-natural) world. You can't ski without snow. You can't skate without ice. And you can't win without understanding that your fate is, in some inextricable way, tied to that of the natural world. Fantastic.

See you there.

Photo credits:
Gillis Gafstrom, a Swedish figure skater Gillis Grafström and Norwegian Sonja Henie, 1924.
Poster from Chamonix games, complete with terrifying eagle.

LOLFLOTUS

In honor of yesterday's post...

The Best Runway In Town

Olympic fashion is everywhere these days, from the front page of the New York Times website-- Seeking Marathon Edge, Can Rice Lead to Gold? (actual first line of article: "Olympic marathon runners are no less obsessed about shoes than the gal pals in 'Sex and the City.'")-- to debates over swim wear (Japan Lifts Swimsuit Ban, BBC News).

But let us leave those discussions to what we call "serious blogs and news sources." No, I know what all of you are here for.

HARK! THE RIDICULOUS!

We begin with a trip down memory lane, to some of the fashions of the past...

Oh Aristidis Konstantinidis, will your mustache ever not be sexy?
He won the first cycling thingy, guys. Show some respect.

The archery lasses didn't get all the long skirt love. Just take a gander at these tennis outfits, circa 1896! Yeesh.

Moving forward, let us consider, for a moment, the Opening Ceremonies. You know, where everyone comes into the stadium, led by a placard-bearer, and all dressed in identical outfits? It's a pretty awesome bonding moment for everyone. But wait a minute, what happens if the designer happens to put everyone in doofy hats?

This. This is what happens.

But this year, surely they've learned their lesson. I mean, that previous photo was from 1992. Fashions have changed since then, right?

"Change" is one word for it...
This is Canada's official 2008 gear. I would not lie about something like this.

This, though. This is fuckin' badass.
Canadian designer, you weren't entirely on crack

Well, let us now consider Italy. Italy is considered to be the birthplace of high fashion. The shows in Milan and Rome truly set the stage for world trends in fashion. Surely their Opening Ceremonies would be in the best of taste and refinement. Right? RIGHT?

Um. Do you see the bitty skiers?

Really, Italy? You're going with the flaming robots?
...Okay. Whatever.

You know what? I could take you through every single fashion faux pas the Olympics has ever caused or been witness to (FIGURE SKATING!! FIGURE SKATING!!), but instead I will just move on to the image that has stuck with me since I was a wee lass of seven. Seriously. Barcelona 1992, may your snow globes never be forgotten.




And now? As we look to Beijing 2008?

Yeah. At least it's not a snow globe.