Happy Olympic Day!

Tune in tomorrow for more of our Summer Sports Spectacular. We must put that aside today, however, to contemplate instead the incredible Triumph of the Human Spirit (and no, I don't mean the statue of the same name in New York City). 

It's Olympic Day!

A day to celebrate athleticism and wonder and joy and the games.

(Occasionally sponsored by McDonald's.)

Happy birthday to the original IOC, from which all this amazingness was born. Let's celebrate in style, with a little John Williams pumping:

Feel the fanfariness

True, the Olympics may just be another international sporting event. But it can be and often is so much more than that. At the risk of sounding like an NBC human interest cutaway, the Olympics features the most amazing athletes in the world doing what they do best. It's a love story between an individual and their nation and songs of bodies in the poetry of motion. It can foster peaceful competition between nations in times of international tension. It's about pride and perseverance, and honestly, the the games are the closest we humans will ever get to real super powers.

And yes, cheesy as it sounds, it can be about the triumph of the human spirit.

Tell 'em, Usain.

First Lady Michelle Obama Wins Figurative Gold Medal at Copenhagen IOC!

UPDATE 2PM EST:

PARTY IN RIO. News at 11.

Update: 12EST:
Chicago NOO! Even Barack Obama couldn't convince the IOC that Chicago wants, no, DESERVES the 2016 Olympics. Americans are making grabby hands, and the IOC said not yet.

Chicago was seen as a leader in the field-- America is good at hosting the Olympics, the last Summer Games in the US took place in Atlanta in 1996, and Chicago spent 4 years and $50 million to woo the IOC. But the IOC would not be wooed.

Chicago lost out in the first round of voting. The USOC was apparently stunned and had no comment. STUNNED. Like with phasers.

9am:
Okay, everybody, today's the big day! In a day that recalls the incredible power of the human will to triumph over all odds in the spirit of peace, good sportsmanship, and healthy international competition, the International Olympic Committee will decide the city for the 2016 Olympic Games!!!

Will it be Chicago, City of Dreams and Architecture?! (Answer: No.)


Or perhaps Tokyo, City of Bright Lights and Bullet Trains?! (Answer: No.)


Or maybe Rio de Janeiro, City of Carnival and the Samba?! (Answer: Yes.)


Or possibly Madrid, City of Spanish Gold and Bull Fights?! (Answer: No.)

The BBC is running an up-to-the-minute live blog of the hearings. As they say:

An International Olympic Committee ceremony in Copenhagen, due to conclude some time after 1730 BST, will select the hosts of the 2016 Olympic Games and it has come down to that quartet. Bed down now for a day of twists, turns, votes and vol-au-vents as I bring you all the gossip and news from Denmark, where experts have already been describing this as the closest bid process in history. It could be a bumpy ride.

I want to go on that ride! As such, look for up-to-date updates (hmmm, I think I'm being redundant) on the proceedings. I will be honest, I am not in Copenhagen. I also have a job. So it might be largely copy-pasted from the BBC site. BUT STILL.

President Obama and First Lady Michelle Obama made the case for Chicago. Apparently the president was a little jet lagged, and, as such, only won the figurative silver medal in Pitching Your City To The IOC, which is actually a little known event in the decathlon (hahaha, jokes). According to CNN:

First Lady Michelle Obama, who's been here a couple of days, cleary took the gold with an emotional speech focused on her family's roots in the the South Side of Chicago and her late father's battle with multiple sclerosis.

"Sports were a gift I shared with my dad — especially the Olympic Games," Mrs. Obama said in her portion of the U.S. delegation's final presentation to the International Olympic Committee here. "Some of my best memories are sitting on my dad's lap, cheering on Olga and Nadia, Carl Lewis, and others for their brilliance and perfection."

Mrs. O gets extra points: first, for mentioning BOTH the Olympics and the Paralympics. Second, for this statement about her father: "He taught me how to throw a ball and a mean right hook better than any boy in our neighborhood," she said. FLOTUS FTW.

Oh man, amazing. Let's see how the others stack up. Check back in shortly.

Unfortunately, Sledge Hockey does not mean Hockey with Sledge Hammers

Let's talk about the Paralympics!

We already gave some brief mention to the Paralympics, but they really deserve more love. Unfortunately, most folks don't mention the Paralympics in discussions about the Olympics, when really, these athletes are at least as deserving of heaps of glory. (Not just because the International Paralympics Committee's website is better designed than the IOC's flashy, unnavigable mess.)

I mean, have you SEEN the movie Murderball?? Holy shit, those athletes are AWESOME.

OMG MURDERBALL

Since the Winter Games are coming upon us, we'll focus on the four Winter Paralympic Sports.

Alpine Skiing:
In both the Paralympics and the Olympics, Alpine Skiing means skiing down a hill that would certainly make me wet myself. Athletes in the Paralympics compete in Downhill, Super-G, Super Combined, the Giant Slalom, and the Slalom (the normal, everyday Slalom, apparently). These events all take place in the Olympics as well, and in both cases there are competitions for men and women. In the Paralympics there are also specific categories for standing skiers, sitting skiers, and visually impaired skiers.

Are there special rules? You bet! "Skiers on one ski are not allowed to use the free limb in contact with the snow to gain speed or to keep balance."

Visually impaired skiers "must wear blacked-out goggles during the competition." They use the same equipment as Olympic skiers (other than the blacked out goggles, of course), and have guides who can communicate only by voice and radio communication.

Oh man. Hard core.

Nordic Ski:
Paralympic Nordic Skiing has two categories: Biathlon and Cross-Country Skiing. Again, it's broken down into standing, sitting, and visually impaired. In contrast with the Paralympic Downhill Skiers, standing Nordic Skiers use the same equipment as able-bodied skiers-- no nifty mini ski-sticks for them! (Nifty mini ski-sticks is not what they are called, but I believe deeply that by coming up with that phrase I have begun my career as a Paralympic Equipment Marketing Consultant. Look for the ad campaign.) Sit skiers use a sit-ski-- really. It's a ski... where you sit. Visually impaired skiiers again have a guide that can guide them through voice or radio.

Nordic Sit Skier: Better than you at everything.

The Biathlon is made up of two events: skiing and shooting. In the Paralympics, all shooters must fire their guns from a prone position. Also? This little exciting nugget from the Vancouver 2010 Paralympics web page: "Visually impaired skiers use an acoustic system for shooting that uses differing tones as the rifle is aimed toward the bull’s eye." OH MAN acoustic aiming!

Wheelchair Curling:
Someday soon we will have a post about Curling, affectionately known as Chess on Ice (no really), because I love it so. Who doesn't love Chess on Ice? You must have a heart made from a stone (and not granite, for that is what a curling stone is made of) to not love Chess on Ice. For now, this is all you need to know: Wheelchair Curling differs in two ways from Non-Wheelchair Curling. First, the athletes are in wheelchairs (I KNOW CRAZY RIGHT?). Second, no sweeping. In the case of Wheelchair Curling, delivering the stone is where the magic happens.

Ice Sledge Hockey:
This is actually one of the first sports adapted such that folks without full use of their legs could continue playing it. It predates wheelchair basketball and murderball. The international rules are essentially the same as Ice Skate Hockey and modeled specifically from the Canadian rules. The equipment is slightly different, of course. The skates have been replaced with a sledge and athletes use two hockey sticks. One is used mainly for propelling along the ice, and the puck handling stick is shorter, straight, and has picks on the end for even more propelling action.

Unfortunately, no sledge hammers in Sledge Hockey.

Also? Sledge hockey brawls. You'd better believe they exist.

***

Occasionally, people get weird about the Paralympics. They're not as popular as the Olympics, they don't happen at the same time, and some folks say they don't serve any purpose. Either the athletes should compete against "real" athletes or they should stay home. If you ever hear anyone talking like that, here's what to do. Tell them about the 2014 British Paralympic hopefuls. Here are three guys, all veterans of either Iraq or Afghanistan, all maimed in the line of duty. What are they doing now? Serving their country with four skis between them.

I'll admit it, I'm a sucker for a story about overcoming adversity with the Olympic Spirit (TM). And that's how it's done, folks. Paralympians deserve nothing more and nothing less than our respect as serious athletes and competitors. We'll be keeping an eye on the Paralympics as well as the Olympics here on Mount Olympics. I hope you'll do the same.

Image sources:
http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2007/10/21/sunday/main3389200.shtml
http://www.paralympic.org/release/Winter_Sports/Alpine_Skiing/Rules/index.html
Vancouver 2010 Paralympic website
http://blogs.smarter.com/sports/2009/03/02/hockey-video-a-different-kind-of-hockey-brawl/

The Torch is on Top of the World

As of today, the torch-wielding Chinese climbing team made it to the very tippy top of the world. Even though there is very little oxygen that high in the atmosphere, the torch blazed true.

This torch is different than the one that traveled around the world-- it was specially designed to blaze on Mount Everest. It was unsullied by controversy, by protests, and by that awkward incident where it actually got extinguished in Paris. Its only job is to burn freely, as high as we can go.